LOSERS! DSCF1999 Out

San Francisco KickBall Coalition

Memorial Day Weekend Kickball Game/BBQ

Posted by on 20 May 2009 | Tagged as: f'n awesome

Hey there Kickballers.

This weekends’ game is going to be @ Speedway Meadow. If you’ve played with us before, it’s the field where we’ve had sloshball in the past (and will have again soon?!?). It’s big, it’s flat, it’s beautiful. Also, since this weekend is Memorial Day, you’ll all have a day to recover from the wonder that is SFKBC and get back to your thrilling day jobs! Also, since it’s memorial day, let’s BBQ! I’ll bring a grill, you bring the foodz. k? Hope to see you all out there this weekend!

commish

First Inning, First Blood!

Posted by on 13 May 2009 | Tagged as: f'n awesome

Welcome to the already-successful second season of kickball. It’s where boys become men, girls become women, and people become weeping, drunken messes. And all of this in the sunshine!

We are awaiting pictures, so I shall paint a picture… with WORDS.

Two teams gathered, full of venom and mirth, to square off against one another via a children’s game. One team, “Vomiting Blood”, excelled remarkably at their namesake. The second team, “Still Bleeding”, proved that their name was not inaccurate. Look, I’m not saying that this is how normal games go, but by the end of it, the field looked like a dozen rehearsals of the end of “Carrie”.

Just kidding! The total blood output (TBO) of the game was maybe a single bucket, MAXIMUM. Plays were called, smiles were shared, and my fucking team lost 4-3. It’s fine, though, as we’re non-competitive, and my team excelled at simply looking fantastic.

Some of you may be asking what the true merit of this game must be. To answer, kickball is as much a sporting event as football, basketball, baseball, or shuffleboard. It’s a sport that, with the aid of just a round rubber ball and superfluous, sometimes completely homoerotic uniforms, can strip away the layers we so carefully build up around ourselves, leaving bare the most beautiful and true nature of a person: the human spirit.

People treat kickball as if it were birthed in our gym classes in elementary school. They fail to read up on their history of this sport that was, at times, quite brutal. The Aztecs played it, with the losing team often given the “march of shame” up the temple steps where their hearts were systematically torn out as sacrifice for the sun god. Full of ignorance, modern-day people fail to recognize the symbolism of sacrifice to a sun god – the sun is round. A kickball is round. You’re smart people, and it’s not rocket science, so I’ll let you all do the math. KICKBALL IS NOT A NEW CONCEPT. It’s full of history, like a delicious History Pot-Pie!

Entrenched deep in history books, newly Knighted members would often attempt to introduce battle with a rival kingdom by approaching the castle walls with a kickball in hand, shortly before being riddled with archer’s arrows and doused in gallons of boiling oil. In the 1920’s, mobsters would often gather in back alleys and abandoned lots to settle a score with a florescent ball and childlike glee. Gone were the tommy guns and cement shoes. The thrill of the sport of kickball plays no favorites; it simply caters to the human soul. The joy one can derive from kickball is universal. And now, in the present, we proudly carry on this tradition that has united the nations while also, ironically, has been responsible for the death of millions. That’s neither here nor there.

As usual, everyone reading this or even THINKING about having their youthful spirits driven into the dirt of the kickball field should attend these games. It’s less about the game, and more about meeting wonderful people. Also worth mentioning is that there is NO game this upcoming weekend, as it’s Bay To Breakers.

I’m going as a screaming goat.

We’ll see you next weekend, May 24th, at a place yet to be determined. Be well, all of you!

love always,

Jared

Mama said kick them balls!

Posted by on 08 May 2009 | Tagged as: f'n awesome

Hey there Kickballers, this is Mrs. Commish speaking, as Mr. Commish is out motorcycling in the wilderness until Saturday. This Mother’s Day, show your Mom that she raised you right by coming out for the (re-scheduled) opening game of SFKBC kickball!
Now, I know what you are thinking, “But Mrs. Commish, I have to spend the day with my mom!”. What? Your mom doesn’t enjoy great game of kickball and a nice cold PBR? I bet you she does. I bet there are a lot of things you don’t know about your mom and the wild times she had between the spring of ’67 and the summer of ’69. So don’t leave her at home- bring her to the game! After all, she gave birth to you, raised you, and put up with all your crap, so really, the least you can do is show her a good time and let her kick some balls.

Game on!

Where: Lindley field, Golden Gate park

When: Sunday, May 10th, 2pm

no games today

Posted by on 03 May 2009 | Tagged as: f'n awesome

Season opener is moved to next week. We hope to see you out at Little Shamrock to talk SFKBC over a few rounds. See you all next Sunday! Stay dry! -commish

Status:: Kickball?

Posted by on 03 May 2009 | Tagged as: f'n awesome

Yeah… so it’s not the nicest weather out.

SFKBC is about having fun, and if it’s wet and cold and muddy our philosophy is to have fun on the indoors. We’re that kind of league, we hope you agree. So I’m going to head over to the fields now and make the call around 1pm, as to weather we will be playing today. Look for another post here and a tweet about it (follow @sfkbc). If the game is canceled we’ll head out to a local bar "Little Shammrock" we hope to see you there and we’ll move the opening weekend festivities to next weekend! Go SFKBC!

commish

Google Updates

Posted by on 24 Apr 2009 | Tagged as: f'n awesome

New Google Maps for the Fields. New google calendar for the schedule. Check ’em out and bring SFKBC into your life.

Opening Weekend!!! May 3rd

Posted by on 14 Apr 2009 | Tagged as: f'n awesome

It’s creeping closer… can you feel it? That shiver down your back when you feel the spring breeze run through your shirt; that eyes wide open smell of fresh cut grass; or maybe it’s the “OMG when were these last washed!” wince from finding last seasons socks bunched in a plastic bag (Anyone? Just me? oh.) Kickball is on!!! I want this season opener to be huge! Tell your friends, tell your friends to tell their friends (and tell their friends to bring beer, seriously), bring your pets, bring your balls, come on, come out and lets get too it!

SFKBC Kickball Season Opener May 3rd, 2pm

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SFKBC ’09 Schedule

Posted by on 01 Apr 2009 | Tagged as: f'n awesome

Ladies and Gentlemen… your 2009 schedule. All Sundays. All games @ 2pm. Fields TBA.

May 3rd - Opener
May 10th - I love you Mom!
May 17th (No Games)- Bay to Breakers
May 24th
May 31st
June 7th
June 14th - Flag Day!
June 21st - Summer Solstice / I love you Dad! Party
June 28th
July 5th (No Games) - Hungover and Full of freedom
July 12th
July 19th
July 26th
August 2nd - Finals

This is NOT an April fools joke. Come’on people, this is serious… this is Kickball!!!

Season ’09 Announcement

Posted by on 22 Feb 2009 | Tagged as: f'n awesome

Kickballers,

I wanted to take a quick second to announce the 2009 season of SFKBC kickball. We are definitely going to have the best, most fun, flat out rock’nest season of kickball this city has ever seen. We really look forward to seeing you all come out this year. Look to this page for a future announcement about the opening game. See you all soon!

commish

11th Inning: A League Of Our Own

Posted by on 15 Jul 2008 | Tagged as: Uncategorized

Listen closely. You can hear the gentle whirring of the turbine blade winding down. The thousands of beating hearts that, every Sunday, were a cacaphony of collective concentration are slowly simmering to a normal beat-per-minute. The collective breath of a multitude of warriors finally exhaling, the sweet release of cleats from aching feet, the stripping of blood-soaked gauze unwound from wasted limbs. Lower the flags, stop the clocks, file away the scorecards, and call your mother once in a while. Would it kill you to do that?

Kickball is over. I’m sure we all remember the Last Game, where we trudged around, heavy with the weight of finality and

Woah! We went out just as we came in – kicking, screaming, kicking more (and drinking). With the completely delightful addition of a Slip N’ Slide (thanks, Jordan!), sliding into home base became less of a chore, more of a mandatory slice of Awesome. Are we going to go out as a kickball team like a bunch of punks, a bunch of black-jean-wearing hipsters who are aggressively trying to look like they’re not having fun? But how can we not have fun when it’s just things like this:

You can’t fake it, people. And we didn’t.

Disputes. Anger. None of these things out of place at a kickball game.

The teams, divided into our groups of farewell and departure for two of the fairest maidens to enter our rennaissance faire of awesomeness, Elyse and Leigha.

It was a horrific match this time due to the fact that there were roughly 20 players on each time on a playing field roughly the size of a book of matches. No one quite knew the score, and that’s exactly how it should be. Also, I could take a turn for the melodramatic and lament the finality of all of this, use gravestone imagery, blah blah, but I’m listening to the Jackson 5, so go fuck yourself. If you want to cry, go watch Steel Magnolias or resolve to never see any of us again. Because that’s not happening: kickball is over, but the blessed social club that came from it all will never die, unless we all die at once. That’s why Jordan never purchased any field space inside of a missile silo or gasoline warehouse.

As much as it pains me to update this page for perhaps the last time, I can say that creating and maintaining this group of kickballers has been a joy. At the start of this series of games, we wondered where it would go, who it would bring, what would happen, and if we would have any foreseeable court dates because of it. While only thirteen of the total participants have ended up in the slammer because of this children’s game, EVERYONE experienced some certain level of euphoria that can only come with stumbling into a group of radical people. People like US.

I’d like to thank every single person that showed up for these games, because without each of you, we’d be a few yokels sitting in a field, waiting for something to happen (See: Nebraska in the summertime). Instead, friendships were formed, and that’s where we leave off. We have our Facebooks, Flickrs, etc, to keep up connected to one another. That’s the grand prize here, and we all won. Kickball may be over, but we all have each other, so let’s not let that fade into this good night (LITERARY REFERENCE). Let’s keep in touch with one another the best we can!

Special thanks overall to Jordan, who rented the field space and got this thing going. Props to Brendan for lugging the bases and beer, Buddy for being the most spirited mascot we could ask for, everyone for bringing smiles and their A-game, Beer for being our unofficial sponsor, and Golden Gate Park for allowing us to frolic in her most blessed fields. It’s been a wonderful time, and we’ll see each other soon. Be well.

love very much,

Jared

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